We Why Sometimes Encourage the “Wrong” Things
By Jessica Jordan, MS. OTR/L
When OT Advice Challenges Parenting Norms
Parenting looks different for everyone, and sometimes occupational therapy homework, home programs, or parent education can challenge the parenting styles and routines families already have in place.
As practitioners, we often encourage play-based activities or exercises that may look chaotic or disruptive from the outside, even though they are developmentally purposeful. In some cases, these activities may overlap with behaviors you are typically discouraging in other settings, which can understandably feel confusing or even frustrating for parents.
Why Messy Eating Might Be Encouraged
When I worked at an outpatient clinic that focused on sensory and feeding goals, I often had to encourage many of my families to allow their child to get messy when they eat. This was encouraged for sensory exploration, child-led autonomy, and encouragement & development of fine motor skills, aka a pincer grasp and tool use.
Hearing that now, as a parent myself, may make me cringe depending on the day, because I can already anticipate the clean-up it will require. However, for a child who is learning, we as parents and caretakers need to provide ample opportunities for unstructured, sensory, exploratory play! With this particular family, that was very hard for the dad to accept, as he was raised in a family where mealtimes were always structured, organized, and clean. It may be hard to make changes in structured activities, but often it can lead to practice and development of a new skill!
Unconventional Play: How Risky Moves Build Skills
You may hear similar recommendations during play, especially at the park. These might include allowing your child to climb up the slide, go down headfirst, swing on their belly, or stand on unsteady surfaces, all with appropriate adult supervision.
While these activities may look “wrong” at first glance, many of them provide valuable sensory input, particularly vestibular input. They also support executive functioning skills such as planning, organization, task initiation, attention, flexibility, risk-taking, and problem solving.
These moments of unconventional play are powerful opportunities for motor learning, body awareness, and adaptive thinking. What may appear chaotic on the surface is often purposeful practice happening beneath it.
Let us know in the comments below what activities you’ve adapted with your child to support skill development in creative or unexpected ways.
Helpful Links
If you found this post helpful, you’ll love our therapy resources! Whether you’re a parent or therapist, our apraxia and autism courses are here to offer practical tools, compassionate guidance, and real-world strategies you can use every day.
👨👩👧👦 For Parents & Caregivers: Autism Training | Online Course for Parents and Caregivers
🧑🏫 For Therapists: Therapist Course for Apraxia and Autism | Mentorship for OTs and Therapists
🏥 Work With Us: In-Person Occupational Therapy (San Diego & Long Beach Areas) | Virtual Coaching
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