By Jessica Jordan, MS. OTR/L

How to Help a Loved One with SPD at Christmas

The holidays can be magical—twinkling lights, cookies fresh from the oven, the happy hum of family filling the house. But for individuals with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), the holiday season can also be overwhelming. SPD affects how the brain processes incoming sensory information, including sound, sight, touch, smell, and even the pace and structure of routines.

While most people are soaking up the sounds, smells, and sights of the season, someone with SPD might be quietly hanging on by a thread.

SPD affects how the brain sorts through incoming sensory information—sound, light, texture, smell, taste. So when Christmas turns the volume up on all of it? It can feel less like a celebration and more like a sensory storm.

But here’s the good news: with a few thoughtful strategies and a lot of heart, we can help our loved ones feel grounded, supported, and genuinely included.

What Might Be Difficult for Someone With SPD at Christmas?

The Noise (Oh, the Noise!)

Holiday gatherings tend to come with layers of sound…Christmas music playing, kids running wild, grown-ups talking over each other, silverware clinking, timers beeping, dogs barking at the doorbell. It’s a whole symphony of chaos. And while some folks might thrive in that holiday hum, for someone with SPD, it can feel like standing in the middle of a construction site—with no way to turn the volume down.

It’s not just “loud”—it’s relentlessly loud. This type of sensory overwhelm can lead to fatigue, irritability, shutdowns, or meltdowns.

Lights & Visual Input

Christmas often means twinkling lights, colorful decorations, blinking inflatables, reflective ornaments, and a home full of visual stimulation. For a sensory-sensitive brain, this isn't just festive—it’s an unfiltered flood of input. Imagine trying to have a conversation while strobe lights are going off and someone’s throwing glitter in your face. Exhausting, right? What feels festive to some can feel busy, chaotic, or disorienting for someone with SPD.

Smells

Pine tree fragrance, scented candles, strong perfumes from guests, warm spices from the kitchen, hot chocolate, baked goods… Christmas is basically one big smell-fest. For many individuals with SPD, scent can trigger overwhelm, memories, emotions, or discomfort.

Textures

Think scratchy sweaters, fuzzy hats, sticky candy canes, unfamiliar foods, and wrapping-paper textures everywhere. To someone without SPD, these little things might seem like minor annoyances. But for a sensitive system, the wrong texture can hijack the entire moment. Textures can be a quiet but powerful contributor to dysregulation.

Changes in Routine and Surprises Everywhere

Routines are often an anchor—and the holidays tend to rip that anchor right out of the ground. School breaks, late nights, travel, visitors, and general unpredictability can make this season feel destabilizing even when the environment is “happy.” For someone with SPD, even good surprises can feel stressful. Knowing what’s coming helps the brain and body stay regulated, so when the schedule shifts constantly, or expectations aren’t clear, the whole day can feel like walking on a tightrope. I sometimes feel this way even as a neurotypical. I am sure you can relate to it too!

How You Can Help

Create Predictability Where You Can

A clear plan doesn’t kill the magic—it creates safety so the magic can actually be enjoyed. Try walking through what the day will look like, step by step. Even better? Use visual supports, write it down, or let them check things off as you go.

Include things like:

Who will be there
What food will be served
When gifts will be opened
How long you’ll stay
What are the options if it gets too much

Keep familiar routines intact when you’re able. A little predictability can soften a lot of stress.

Offer Sensory Breaks

Thinking ahead and doing a little planning can make a world of difference. That might look like scoping out a quiet room ahead of time, bringing along noise-canceling headphones, or taking a walk together before the main event. Whether it’s a few minutes in the car, a step outside into the fresh air, or a cozy corner with soft lighting, these quiet spaces give your loved one a chance to recharge or release some of the overwhelm.

Be upfront about it—let your loved one know that breaks are always acceptable. Say something like, “If it starts to feel like too much, just tell me. We can step away anytime.” Knowing they have that option can help them breathe a little easier from the start.

Prepare the Environment

If you’re hosting—or even just helping out—a few small shifts can go a long way. The holidays are all about coming together with the people we love—and part of love is action. It’s not just the words we say or the hugs we give. Love is in what we do. That might look like turning the music down just a notch, swapping out those blinking lights for something softer, and maybe skipping the scented candles or diffusers this year if you know someone’s sensitive to fragrance.

It’s about creating a space that feels calmer, yes—but more than that, it’s about creating a space that feels considered.

Pack a Comfort Kit

Before you head out, take a moment to gather a few things that help your loved one feel settled. Pack a favorite snack, a soft hoodie, a pair of noise-reducing headphones, a weighted blanket, or a favorite fidget. Any item that will help them feel calm and grounded. Keep these items available at all times during the celebration. If you’re going to someone else’s house, it’s more than okay to ask ahead if there’s a quiet spot you could use if needed. Most people are glad to help when they know how.

Respect Boundaries

The holidays can bring a lot of pressure to join in, to go with the flow, to do things the “normal” way. But your loved one might need something different. It’s okay to arrive late, leave early, or opt out entirely. They might not be up for hugs or group games or sitting at a full dinner table. That’s ok. They might want to open gifts later, or in a quieter space, not in front of the crowd. That’s ok. Reduce the pressure wherever possible.

Co-Regulate Through It All

Your calm presence, steady breathing, and grounded energy matter. You don’t need the perfect script. You just need to stay attuned, caring, and responsive.

You Are Not Alone

Whether your loved one experiences sensory challenges every day or just during high-energy seasons like Christmas, you’re part of a community navigating similar terrain.

The goal isn’t to have a picture-perfect holiday.
The goal is to help your loved one feel understood, safe, and genuinely included.

Wishing you and your family a Christmas that feels cozy, connected, and exactly right for you. ❤️🎄

Helpful Links

If you found this post helpful, you’ll love our therapy resources! Whether you’re a parent or therapist, our apraxia and autism courses are here to offer practical tools, compassionate guidance, and real-world strategies you can use every day.

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 For Parents & Caregivers: Autism Training | Online Course for Parents and Caregivers

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