How Modeling Supports Social-Emotional Learning

Jul 22

An occupational therapist sits on the sidewalk and models emotional regulation through play.

By Jessica Jordan, MS. OTR/L

There’s a quote I love and live by:
“Growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional.” – Carroll Bryant 🤪

One of the best things you can do while playing with your child is modeling emotional regulation and foundational skills through play. Their brains are truly like sponges, and they watch everything we do.

The Power of Modeling Through Play

Engaging with toys and modeling calmness through deep breaths are simple ways to teach play skills and mindful regulation strategies. This little one was unsure of my “finger monsters,” so I began playing with them while she sat back and observed. By the end of our time together, she couldn’t get enough of these guys—utilizing them in numerous ways while developing a range of foundational skills, including visual-motor development, tactile processing, fine motor skills, imaginative play, sharing, and social interactions.

Try Deep-Breathing as a Co-Regulation Tool

While modeling during play is powerful, these same strategies can be applied to everyday routines. Even outside of playtime, your child is picking up on how you respond to stress, transitions, or dysregulation. One of the simplest tools you can model anytime, anywhere? Deep breaths.

This weekend, try modeling 1–2 big deep breaths while around your little ones. See if they imitate, if their shoulders drop, or their body shifts into a more relaxed state—all from you modeling a calm body. 😮‍💨

Let me know what happens (even if you've modeled and noticed no difference, there’s no harm in modeling a self-care skill like deep breaths😉).

Helpful Links

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